What Is Inclusive Practice Anyway?.........(Chapter 21)

 

Wednesday 

4th January 2022

Inclusive practice, what is it? Why is it so important in Childcare? How do I embed it in my service?  These are just some of the questions I have been asked over the years as an Educational Leader and someone who focuses on Inclusive Practice. 

The Cambridge Dictionary defines Inclusive as: An inclusive group or organization tries to include many different types of people and treat them all fairly and equally. It further defines Practice as: something that is usually or regularly done, often as a habit, tradition, or custom. In short, in respect to the Early Childhood Sector, it's about making our services more accessible and welcoming to everyone regardless of their backgrounds. The question still remains, why is this so important? Allow me to explain with a few different scenarios. 

Around 65,000 years ago, the first Australians landed on our shores from around the islands of Southeast Asia. They came to this country we now know as Australia when the sea levels were at a lower point and the land between Australia and New Guinea was less of a challenge to travel across by sea. Indigenous Australian's lived off the land and the oceans surrounding the country eating berries, fish and land animals that they hunted with their tools that they made with their hands using what was available on the land. They set up communities and passed down stories from the Elders through dreamtime stories and Aboriginal Paintings left behind in caves and walls so that their rich culture was passed down through the generations of Aboriginal children who one day would become the Elders of those same communities. 

Just over 200 years ago, the British landed on the once peaceful Aboriginal homelands and set about setting up a colony where they could send their convicts. In the process of this, the British cleared and destroyed vast amounts of lands, slaughter countless Aborigines and as was popular at the time with the British, use indigenous people as Slaves. They Raped and pillaged what they could from the Aboriginals and forced them to live under their rules. 

I often use this as an example for children when I try and explain what that would be like in a way that the children can understand. "It's kind of like me turning up at your house and telling you that this is now my place, and you can't live here anymore. You and your family who have been living here for years now have to move and you also have to live by the rules I tell you. How does that make you feel?" The answer is the same every time, Sad!

Children have a way of understanding things more than we give them credit for at times. They are influenced by those around them including their families and peers. For too many years when I was growing up, I was taught to believe that the Aboriginals were nothing but an excuse to make fun of. There were a whole host of Aborigine jokes that I now cringe over even thinking of uttering them to others. One of them doing the rounds was that Aboriginals were referred to as boongs because that was the sound, they made when hitting a car bumper. You see, we all believed because that's all we knew that the Aboriginals spent most of their days walking the streets in a drunken stupor and cars would often hit them on dole day as they cashed their dole payment. Obviously, highly offensive but again, this is how many of us grew up with the influences around us. Thankfully, my views have changed dramatically over time. 

It strikes me as odd that we claim to be the lucky country and welcome anyone and everyone to our country to build a better life, but the reality is, that many people are still stuck in the past and afraid of what they don't understand. Deep down, there is a horrible racist undertone in this country and sadly, it's in own Parliments with some of our politicians being the worst offenders.  I consider myself a person that is Inclusive of all cultures and many times over the years I have heard horror stories from other Educators that have come here from other countries to build a better life for themselves and their families only to be told that their qualifications are not good enough and get treated like outsiders from the get-go. They are taunted with racist remarks and in some cases it's almost a case in some services that it's the white Australians on one side and the multi-cultural Australians on the other side. I have seen less qualified white Australians promoted over more qualified Indian Australian's. I had once had an Asian Educator tell me that she was so sadden at being considered as different from Anglo Australian's that she was going to have an operation on her eyes to make herself appear more westernised.  Unfortunately, there are many more stories like these I've heard over the years and sadly things are not getting better.

We as Educators have a chance to change this by teaching our children to be accepting and more tolerant of different cultures instead of fearing them. Incorporate cultural events into your program's curriculum. Embrace different languages, foods, customs and traditions. Focus on the children in your room, find out what their family backgrounds and talk about the countries that their families come from. Get the parents involved and invite them in to talk about experiences and places from their childhood. 

We also need to do better at acknowledging Aboriginal Culture than just recognising it only during NAIDOC week and Sorry day. We need to be embedding it into the center and its philosophy but how do we do that? Get in contact with the Elders in your area. Don't know where to start, begin with your local council. They will point you in the right direction. Looking into PD courses that teach how to incorporate an Aboriginal Perspective while respecting the culture. I can suggest getting in contact with Jessica Staines and her amazing Koori Curriculum. There are also some amazing resources from MTA and Educating kids from floor mats that have all the different Mobs scattered around Australia to some beautiful Dreamtime stories. It is so important to explore this rich and beautiful culture from its music, dancing and stories. It's all simple things that can be done. 

Of course, there is another group that we need to include in our look at Inclusive practice. The LGBTQI community. Why you ask? Kids don't need to hear about that. I don't want them pushing the agenda on my child. The truth is, that no one is trying to push any agenda on anyone. The simple fact is that more and more same sex families are enrolling their children in daycare. There are more Educators and people in the general community that are finding the courage to step out of the closet and revealing that they are Transgender. The simple fact is that children are bound to run into at some time someone from the LGBTQI community and they need to be given the tools on how to negotiate that interaction. Gone are the days, in this country at least that people are locked up for the sexuality. 

Like all these different minority groups, they have been judged, persecuted and mistreated in the past and we have the power to change that by incorporating Inclusive Practice into our curriculums.

  

He Is Risen............(Chapter 20).......Dedicated to Katie

 

Sunday 
4th April 2021

It's kind of funny I feel that I don't often talk about my faith for fear of turning people away from it. Allow me to try and explain that a little. I have never been the kind of person that beats others over the head and tell them that their going to hell if they don't repent their sins. I never felt that it was my place and felt awkward when others did it to me. The other side of that, especially since transition is that I didn't want the church I belong to get any negative blow back for allowing someone like myself to attend. Yes, even still I have a lower opinion of myself than I should have but my problem is that I care what others think. No so much about what they think of me anymore, but what they think of the people who support me. I don't want them to lose patronage  as a result of my  attendance.

I know that there will be some reading this who will say things like that don't see me as anything different than the woman I present as. They know who I am and I appreciate them more than they will ever realise. These are the people that give me hope, not just acceptance, but a spiritual home to go with that where I am missed when I don't attend. 

Over the past few weeks, I haven't been able to attend my regular Church Service mainly because my car has given up and I have a lend car at the moment that I'm trying only to drive when necessary. This on top of a bout of flu that I have been dealing with that has seen me spend sometime in bed trying to rest up. Also, over this past month, I have taken on a new role as an Assistant Centre Manager at a new center. More about this in another chapter, but it goes without saying that I have been throwing myself deep into my work and probably neglecting my own needs. 

This week, being Easter weekend, I decided to make an extra effort to attend and touch base with those who I have missed over the last few weeks. Little did I know what was to come of this meeting and how I would be feeling after it. 

For those he didn't read my last update back from August last year......(Yeah, I know, I couldn't believe it had been that long also. Need to change that, that's for sure). would know that I have been and continue to be a member of the Salvation Army. Although now a days, I'm not in uniform anymore, my hope is one day that I get to wear it again proudly as I once did. Over the month of December it was announced that our Corp was receiving new Officers. Now, I must admit, this filled my heart with terror because I'd built quite a bond with our current Officers and felt both welcomed and safe with them around. I didn't know anything about these new Officers and worried if they would accept me in the same way. 

I needn't of worried because after they were installed, I had the opportunity to talk to Katie, one of our new officers. Now, nothing against Matt her husband, but as I have mentioned in the past, I have a deep seeded mistrust for males and I struggle to talk to them. Katie reassured me during our conversation that I was very much welcomed to be there. Over the coming weeks, I saw her words turn into action as she seemed to stand for everything I stood for. We both have a thing for inclusive practice but in our own fields. These officers were acknowledging the first and traditional owners of this land as well as having worked with the LGBTQI Community. 

Today, took that to a whole new level for me. As I listened to todays bible reading as we recounted the events of that very first Easter when Jesus had gone through unimaginable torture and pain at both the hands of the Roman Empire and the Jewish Judicial body (Sanhedrin), that saw him whipped, beaten, crucified and stabbed before he died. He was taken down of the cross, wrapped in the traditional Hebrew way with white cloths and then placed in a tomb with a large stone placed in front of the entrance to seal the tomb. We then heard how the two Mary's went to visit the tomb with Joanna to perform a ceremony with spices only to discover that Jesus had left the building leaving two angels to explain the events. 

Now, I like many others there had heard this story before and without giving to much away. "He Is Risen". The thing that many of us focused on was who is this Joanna lady who suddenly appeared. Don't recall her popping into the story before but Katie who herself researched and discovered Joanna mention in Luke 24:10. put all our minds at rest. 

This was what really got me. Katie posed the question, what would of happened if Jesus did rise from the dead that first Easter Sunday? Well, there wouldn't be an Easter Sunday, their wouldn't be the New Testament and possibly not even a church. Christians from all around the world wouldn't know that Jesus even existed let alone was crucified for our sins. "He hung there for our Sins". tough words to hear for a believer, imagine how hard that must be for a non believer. From this point the service went a little off script and headed off on its own tangent. 

With the passion of witnessing so many things that have been done so wrong in the church and knowing how things could be so much different with a bit or mutual respect, Katie began speaking about how the church needs to be more encompassing and respectful of those who come from different back grounds. To see each other as people first before looking for the differences in each other. 

For too many years, the churches attitude to certain minorities has turned people away from the church with their double standards. I myself felt and obviously still feel that because of who I am, will I be accepted. I know with the Church Family that I have now, I am accepted. It doesn't stop the occasional double take from visitors that walk through the door. Last year, as an example, our Corp was visited from the Melbourne City Staff Band. I was actually so excited to see them as it had been such a long time since hearing a traditional Salvation Army Band in a citadel. The music itself, didn't disappoint but unfortunately the message was traditional Salvation Army and not very inclusive. That day and today I was both moved to tears for two very different reasons. 

It was so refreshing hearing someone spell out my journey without actually referencing me because it was about me. It was about everyone who had felt unwelcomed, unneeded and unloved. It was about those people who come in, who have swallowed their pride to ask for assistance to feed their families and offered that assistance and given hope. After all, that's what today is all about, Hope. 

If we as a church, can't offer that basic human need of hope, why are we even here? 

This chapter wasn't the one that I had meant to send out today. I actually have another one that I had part written but not completed but as happens with me, at times, what I set out to write becomes something else entirely different. As God spoke through Katie today, I like to think God works through my words and directs me where he feels I need to be. 

Katie, I dedicated this one to you because no one has moved me so much as you did today. You have a gift and a passion that I admire so much and we as a church are so blessed to have both you and Matt  lead us into the future. Thank you so much for delivering the message that I so badly needed to hear today. 

One more thing I need to say about today. I am so very blessed to have my amazing church family by my side. When it was obvious today that Katie's words were working through me and my emotions started to react, it was so nice for someone to reach out and hold my hand as we prayed together. She will be reading this now so Thank You Liz for sharing this very powerful moment with me today.   

Sharon

Blood, Fire and Spirit. (Part 19)

 

Tuesday 11th August 2020

I'm going to take you back in time a couple of years for this one taking you back to part way through 2018. I had just been offered a  new position at a service in Pakenham which I had visited on a couple of occasions already as relief staff. The center was amazing and to be honest, it would have to be to leave the service that I had already been working for the last few months where I had made quite a name for myself  as an Educational Leader and fitted in well with all the amazing educators that I was working with. 

Pakenham had that wow factor, it had a beautiful front foyer and welcoming staff that made you feel comfortable straight away. The yards were amazing, especially the Kinder Yard and I was just awestruck with the way the management team related to the Educators there. It was something that i had missed over the previous last year. When I was offered the position, I jumped at it and within a week of being there was called into the back office. I sat down with the Director and her second and was asked how I felt about the service. I told nervously them (no one enjoys being called into an office anywhere as it doesn't always end in good news and I had had my share of bad news in that previous year) that I was feeling really good about the move and felt like I was getting along with everyone really well. The Director seemed happy with that reply and went on to say that she had heard nothing but great things from all the educators and families that she had spoken to. She then went on to offer me a role as Room Leader for her Big 2s room. I hadn't room lead a two year old room before and was not sure how my style of teaching would relate to this age group but I was up for the challenge. My reply to her was pretty typical of me, "Let me think about that for a moment...Ah, yes". 

So, it was decided, I spent the next week doing handover with the previous Room Leader and met my two amazing assistants. One thing that I can always say is that I have been very lucky in my life to have some awesome assistants. Jess and Elvie were two of the finest. We clicked together so well and turned the whole room around. Quite literally, we redesigned the room, redesigned the focus in the room and concentrated on doing lots of mini projects focusing on each Childs interest.  Before long we had the children talking about subject matter that they hadn't even thought of before but taking it home and telling their parents. I'll never forget the conversation that I had with a mum during that time all excited about something she witnessed her son doing over that weekend. She told me that she found her son drawing a picture of a man, she decided to ask who the man was. The child thought for a moment and replied "It's Neil Armstrong", bewiled she asked, "Who's Neil Armstrong"? Her almost 3 year old looked up and said "He was the first man on the moon". The Mum told me that she was so surprised that he knew this and had to Google to see if he was right. 

It was during this time I had noticed one of the parents who brought her child in always came in wearing a Salvation Army top. Having been a Salvo many years before, I wasn't sure whether to approach her or not feeling anxious because of being transgender. Sounds stupid now looking back, but she almost scared me because I was worried how she would react if I ever had her child in my care. I didn't know if she was an officer or someone who worked in one of the Thrift Shops, I just knew she was a Salvo. 

As time progressed, towards the end of the 2018, we started transitioning children to get them used to their new rooms. As luck would have it, one of the children was the child of the Salvo lady that I was more or less avoiding conversation with. This child was an absolute ball of energy and a joy to have visiting in my room over the course of the transition period. One of the days, I noticed her sitting in a big wooden box that I had in the room. The children would usually build it into a cubby house or something similar, but here was this child doing something totally different. I approached the child and asked her what she was doing. Firstly, I should explain that she was sitting in this box with a block in her hand moving it from left to right and making some odd noise. The child looked at me and said these immortal words, "I'm driving to Church, do you want to come with me?" 

That was definitely an OMG moment, it was like she knew that I was having problems with communicating with her Mum while at the same time knowing something that I was desperately missing. If you have read previous parts to my journey, you would now how much the Salvation Army has meant in my life and here was this child inviting to drive me there. I didn't get to tell mum that night and wasn't sure how to approach her about it but knew that she had to know. Its a tradition with most centers that they have their end of year break up party for the kids and families. I noticed Mum was there and decided that now was the time to tell her what I saw. 

Mum looked at me, smiled and said, you need to come. I told her about my  reservations and that I didn't want to make any of the congregation feel uncomfortable  with my presence. She explained to me that Pakenham Corp has some very progressive thinking Officers and that they would love to have me there. Sure enough, the next time I saw her at the center she told me that she had spoken to her officers about me and they reiterated her feelings saying that they want me there. I got some details from her and told her I would thing about it. 

One Sunday morning she messaged me and told me that she had had a dream that night that God had told her that she needed to tell me that I had to be there today. I'm like really, why today especially? She told me she didn't know but she had past on the message and done her part, the rest was up to me. I asked her what time the service started and she replied that it started at 10am. I'm like, it's 8:30am now and I'm still in bed. 

Somehow, in an hour and a half, I managed to jump in the shower, get dressed and drive the 30min drive to Pakenham to arrive a couple of minutes after 10am. I walked into that hall and although I can't quite explain it but I felt home straight away. The Mum came up to me and asked me to sit with her and I did. I remember standing up singing the songs that were being projected on the screen and thinking this feels right. Every so often, one of the lines in the song were being amplified at me from the mum with an occasional wink to say, that's you. 

During the service, they had a commitment ceremony  which is like the Salvation Army version of a baptism. The family that was dedicating their baby was from Nigeria, I at that time had just met a Nigerian girl online called Lara. I'm like, what are the chances that in the middle of Pakenham, on the day I attend church for the first time in years a Nigerian child is being dedicated. The sermon began and it was all about Inclusion and Inclusive practice partially in relation to the church and how in the past they have ignored certain people and that time had passed. One of the songs we sung after the sermon and to end off the meeting was from one of my favorite Christian artists, Michael W Smith. That was it for me, if I needed any other signs that I was meant to be there I would have just been trying to avoid the unavoidable. 

After the service, I was introduced to both the officers and straight away, I knew what the Mum was tying to tell me. They were both so down to earth and full of compassion. The rest of the congregation introduced themselves to me one by one over a cup of coffee and a plate of biscuits and the feeling of finally being home again hit me. Over the following weeks I became a regular fixture around the Corp and one Sunday, I decided to give my testimony about how I had been searching, wanting and hoping to get back to church but was worried about how I would be received as a result. I went on to say that from the moment I walked into Pakenham Corp, I felt immediately at ease and that was a testament in itself to the congregation that had built that and I thanked them for allowing me to be with them. 

I was surprised at the end of it when some of the older Salvos came over to me after the service and told me that I'd really touched a place in their hearts and began thanking me. From that point on, Pakenham was my home and although I was working in Pakenham and traveling 30mins each day for work, I was more than happy to do the same on a Sunday to be with my Salvo family. 

During this time I have made some amazing connections that I know will last a life time and some unfortunately ran out when my usefulness ran out. Some lessons are very hard to learn at times and although I was getting warning signs from friends around me along the way I kept giving them the benefit of the doubt until I saw it with my own eyes what was happening. I'm not going into anymore detail than that because sadly, those feelings are still pretty raw and to be honest, I'm left feeling foolish because I thought I was helping when in actual fact I was only enabling the bad decisions that this person was making.  

Over the course of 2019 I was becoming more and more imbedded in the Army and even at one point considered going back into uniform. I wasn't sure exactly how that was going to work but it was a real possibility at the time. Pretty soon, it was my favorite time of year roll around. Red Shield Appeal Sunday. Something I always looked forward to. In the past I door knocked, played chicken on the road at the traffic lights dodging cars and stood in shopping centers beside the kettle. Every year after the appeal we would go back to the Corp and the ladies there would feed us while some would sit at tables and count the donations coming in. It was a real feeling of community and I actually missed being apart of that. Red Shield 2019 was very different to those days, no more door knocking, little traffic light work due to restrictions which left Shopping centers and Bunnings and the Red Shield Sunday became a two week appeal. 

That first day I volunteered for Bunnings, let me tell you, I have a new found respect for the door greeters at Bunnings after that because nothing is colder than sitting in the wind tunnel they call the front doors at Bunnings. It was so freaking cold that no amount of clothing was going to warm me up. The following week I volunteered for the shopping center and loved every minute of it. As I was working in Pakenham, I knew a lot of the families walking past and it was a change to see them in a different light. Of course the children would do the usual double take when they look at you and try and figure out where they know you because your not in the usual uniform. 

Around May 2019 I had fallen into another slump thanks to my depression. I fell into a complete hole and struggled to climb out of it. To me, everything that I had worked so hard for over the years was being threatened again. I was becoming consumed by the black hole that left me feeling what's the point of going on. It was the Salvos that help save me from that. My officer rang me up one day after the Sunday service in which I hadn't attended. He asked if I was ok, I told him I was struggling to function. Later that day, he and his wife rolled up on my doorstep with donuts looking for coffee and to sit with me for a while, I told them what was happening and they both stuck by me through one of the darkest moments in my career. 

It was around this time that I was recording an interview with the amazing Dr Ruby Red Scarlet for her upcoming online course, "My Friend Has Two Mums: Gender and Sexuality in Early Childhood". Incidentally, this amazing course featuring me is happening again on the 1st September 2020. I will leave a link to the Multiverse site on the Inclusive Educator Facebook page. I remember during the interview being filled with sadness about the predicament I was in and that projected in the interview as being somewhat negative in certain aspects. After the interview Red ask me what was happening and I explained to her. She gave me some amazing advice as you would expect and from that point began crawling back out of the hole. We decided to re-record the interview and I'm so glad we did because the second version was amazing an exactly the message I wanted to get across in the first place. 

Towards the end of 2019, I met a girl who I liked very much. I decided to spend my weekends getting to know her better as weekends were our only time to catch up as she lived in the city. I always intended to go back to the Salvos, they helped me through some tough time but at the time, I had to give my all to my new relationship. The new year rolled around, Covid broke out, the relationship broke down  and before long, restrictions became the new normal. I still keep in contact with my church family but not seeing them every week to catch up and share that experience has been hard.

 I was never a smash you over the head with my beliefs especially my religious ones.  I believe that is up to the individual, me forcing people to go to church is only going to make them rebel more. I have many friends now, and yes, some of them happen to be atheist's and one in particular is probably  reading this now. I don't question her beliefs as she doesn't directly question mine. Some of her posts though I must admit make me squirm but then I think she's entitled to her opinion as I am entitled to mine and I just scroll past. 

Hopefully by Christmas 2020, we can all be together again but sadly I doubt it given the current Covid climate. Until we all do met again in that very precious, newly repainted.......yet again,  church, I want to just say to all at Pakenham Corp, thank you so much for making me feel so welcome over the past couple of years and knowing that I will always have a home among you. Thank you also to the little girl who offered to drive me to church. Who knows, with one more lifestyle change, that uniform could still become a reality.

Sharon Priestley

I don't usually do this but I would like to dedicate this blog to two very special girls, Zoe for offering me a lift and to Jasmine who inspired me to write again. Thank You both. 

Bushfires and Killer Viruses........Lets push ctrl/alt/delete on 2020 (Part 18)

Saturday-Sunday
21st and 22nd March 2020


Well, Most of you would be forgiven for thinking the world has gone totally mad in the last few months. If you had of told me that my first blog for 2020 would be about a killer flu virus that seems to be taking over the world a little more each day I would of said something like "Not even my creative mind could come up with such a tale of craziness", but here we are. 

I, like most people first heard about the Corona Virus or Covid-19 as its known now first in December last year. I must admit, at first I didn't think to much about it as I had other things happening in my life at that point. Life was as good as it could be, my career was going well and I was for the first time in years in a relationship that was mutually respectful and I was lost in feelings that I hadn't felt in years. The last thing I had on my mind was a killer virus. 

As December and 2019 drew to a close, the country was facing a far more pressing threat in the way of Bushfires. Due to the lack of rain in many of our rural areas across the country and the miss management of the federal government in respect to managing fuel reduction in the area's that needed it the most, not to mention, ignoring plea's from fire chiefs to invest more money into the respective fire services and purchasing more aerial firefighting water bombers to help combat the threat of bushfire. Fires broke out in Queensland, New South Wales, Victoria and Tasmania and as the fires began burning down and destroying lives and Australian  livelihoods, the Prime Minster of this country decided to fly off with his family to Hawaii for a holiday leaving the country with a rather large smoke cloud hanging overhead. 

After cries of "Scomo, where the bloody hell are you?" he, the Prime Minster finally decided to pack his suitcase and head home to face the music. Let me just tell you, the orchestra had been fine tuning their instruments and ready to unleash a crescendo the likes before have never been heard. Scomo copped it from fellow politicians, everyday Australians and of course the people on the front line that where putting their own lives at risk each time they went out to face the threat day after day. The heat boiled out into the streets and unfortunately, Mr. Morrison wasn't doing himself any favors by forcing victims of the bushfires to shake his hand for a cheap photo opportunity for the morning papers. 

I've always said that I'm non-political, to be honest, the subject boars me to tears. There are some politicians that I watch and think really, how is this meant to help the average Australian in their day to day life? I believe that Donald Trump is a misogynist who needs to be relieved from his duties as soon as possible because for the last 3-4 years, he has turned his country into a laughing stock and only served his own purposes by stroking his own massive ego.  As far as Scomo goes, his kind of conservative politics with a touch of radical Christianity thrown in is never going to be a good fit for anyone that he doesn't agree with, people like myself. Dan Andrews at least seems to have his finger on the pulse of all Victorians especially the LGBTQI community in our state but that's as political as I get. At the end of the day, I keep my head down and try not to ruffle any feathers and concentrate on what I do best, teaching and nurturing children and educators. 

So eventually the bushfires stopped attacking our country and everyone breathed a collective sigh of relief. It was time to step back and consider the cost of what just happened. The fires burned for 5 months and caused the death of 33 people with almost 3000 houses destroyed. The fires also decimated 7.7 million hectares of Australia that once housed over 1 billion animals that lost their lives. It is estimated that in monetary terms, it has cost in excess of 100 Billion dollars but in real human terms, sadly we will never know. Each one of those 33 people who lost their lives left someone behind. Each one of those 3000 houses destroyed left a family homeless and having to start their lives from scratch. 

It was a time that we witnessed amazing community involvement with everyone pitching in to try and help the victims that lost everything. Donations of food, clothing and money rolled in on a daily basis. Bushfire relief concerts were held across the country to aid in the effort which led to everyday Australians giving whatever they could. Farmers where sending their own stock feed to other farmers that were suffering and with nothing to feed their animals. Everyday, we woke up to a smoke haze that reminded us that our fellow Australians were going through hell at the moment and anything that we could do to help take that pain away would be appreciated. I can't begin to describe the pride I felt in our own  local community when I would see pages on Facebook looking for donations of toys, clothing and food to take up to the hotspots of some of the worst affected. Our own Sikh community decided to pack up their food van and head to the worst affect places and cook and donate free food to the volunteers and victims of the fires. This is what our country has been about for many years. When Australians are down and hurting, we pass the hat around to help them out. 

Sadly, in recent days, with the Corona Virus, this has not always been the case. Unfortunately we have seen not only Australians do a total backflip, but also the rest of the world. Everyone seems to be thinking about their own needs and wants and leaving nothing for the country's most vulnerable who can't afford to panic buy even the necessities let alone the luxuries. 

Lets go back to the beginning of this whole pandemic thing and start from the start. The Corona virus as I said earlier had first come to my  attention back in December, didn't think for a minute that it would be something like it is today. Once the threat of the bushfires had dissipated and it was found that the virus was beginning to spread from country to country, that's when I sat up and took notice. Up until that point if anyone was sick around me I would joke about and say things like "You better not have Corona virus". I'd even tell them I would spray them with disinfectant on them if they sneezed near me. I don't joke about it anymore, I actually find myself taking a step back from people now whether it be subconsciously or not, I just do it. I panic when I cough too much or discover that my throat seems a little sore, but then it gets better overnight and I put it down to coughing to much the day before. 

As it stands as I write this, the total worldwide stands at 307,037 cases confirmed with 13,034 deaths. In Australia there has been 1072 cases confirmed with 7 people dying as a result. On the grand scale of things, our country is seemingly riding the storm out quite well compared to some of the European countries who have had to go into lock down. Having said that, we aren't predicted to hit our peak until around June so I guess I should reserve my judgement a little while longer. 

Once again, I feel that the Australian governments position is not strong enough at them moment. I understand that the country can't just stop for two weeks because it's not a viable solution to keep the company going but keeping schools and childcare centers open is a bit problematic when where banning public gatherings of over 500 and indoor events to some other mathematical equation depending on the size of the room. Social distancing is not something that can be achieved effectively in a childcare center because we are constantly nurturing and supporting these children with social and emotional communication. If a child falls over and hurts themselves, they instinctively go to an educator for support of the educator will go to them. The child doesn't understand social distancing and it creates more confusion and anxiety for the child if they can't be comforted with a simple hug. I understand that keeping children is in centers is to protect the elderly from coming into contact with children who make have colds but if this is the case, they should be in self-quarantine with their parents, not out and about visiting grandma at the retirement village or nursing home. The other situation is that I understand that some Grandparents to have custody or have their Grandchildren in their care due to different circumstances but if the children are sick, they all should be in self-quarantine. 

Educators have families of their own and as much as they don't want to walk away from their services, they also don't want to contract anything from the children and pass it on to their own families and putting them at risk. I guess I'm lucky in this respect because I live alone and don't need to worry about passing anything on to anyone else. If I'm not feeling 100%, I stay home and not go anywhere till I'm feeling all good again. Usually my problem is exhaustion because I always give everything I have to my work both during the day and at night. It's just what I do because I love what I do. 

So, here we are at the end of another Blog, a little different than my usual content I know but with this thing happening all around us I thought it was a blog that needed to be written to show the contrast between the community spirit during one major event and this event happening now. We all need to calm down and stop panic buying from shops because it is hurting the most disadvantaged people in our community, the elderly, the unemployed, the single parents out there fighting to put something on the tables for their kids to eat each night and more than likely going without themselves. We have warehouses of food and supplies ready for the shops so we need to slow down and stop buying it all before it hits the shelves and leaving nothing for others. Things like Toilet Paper, Hand sanitizer, tissues, feminine sanitary products, rice, pasta, fresh and frozen fruit and vegetables, meat and milk. Its all waiting to go onto our shelves if shoppers allowed the stores to put it out for everyone. We shouldn't have to fight and brawl in shopping centers over toilet paper. 

One think I want to add before I close this one off. A big part of my work and any educators work for that matter, should be critical reflection. It's something I do quite a bit in my day to day life and conversations I have with fellow educators. In the beginning of this, I was talking about how I didn't take it seriously because it was overseas and not effecting the rest of the world at that point. Besides, the bushfires were more of a pressing issue at the time. I was making light of the situation and saying when someone sneezed around that you better not have corona virus. The person I said this most to was an Educator of Asian decent. She wasn't from China but it's irrelevant. The point is I said something that was meant to be funny without realizing that comments like this could be considered hurtful if not racist. Of course that was never my intension as I've built a career on being inclusive of all nationalities, religions and cultural differences but my comments were wrong.

I find myself getting mad a phrases like "The China Virus" uttered by dimwitted politicians who have no grasp of reality. It saddens me when I hear how some Asian restaurants are having to close down because patrons are frightened to go out to them for fear that they might get Corona Virus. Asians are being verbally attacked and spat on in public while being blamed for this outbreak when their no more to blame than the rest of the world.  

The phrase Covid-19, sounds like the name of some rogue undercover agent with a license to kill. Up until now, it has had that opportunity but they only way we are going to stop this thing is by working together to defeat it. That means placing yourself in self-isolation if your not well, wash your hands regularly and be kind to each other. 

Sharon 

Looking for love in all the wrong places.......(Part 17)

Tuesday 8th October 2019

It's certainly been a while since the last one of these, so I thought it was time to write another one. Its not that there hasn't been a shortage of material to write about, its more that life got in the way and I simply haven't had the time to write it all down. 

I guess, I should update you all on the Lara situation. As it was the last once I wrote all the back in January. Well, things were going well for a while, when I say a while, I mean about a month, then everything just sort of vanished. Lara went missing and for all intensive purposes, fell off the face of the earth. She eventually contact me to say that she had been in hospital and had no way of contacting me. After a while, the distance between had became to great and I couldn't sustain any sort of relationship with her because I needed human contact. With Lara being in another country and with me never having a chance to visit her, I decided to call it quits. Thankfully, Lara was very understanding and we still remain friends because I think she was feeling the same. 

By the time I had finally called it quits with her, another drama had taken up all of my time and effort and to be honest, I couldn't think of anyone else at the time and focused on getting through one of the biggest challenges in my life. That will be the subject of another blog at another time when I workout how to tell that story and avoid the legalities involved. 

After I came out the other side of that drama and was able to breath again, I decided to dive back into the murky world of Internet dating. What an eye opener that is. Internet dating wasn't a thing before i was married, heck, the Internet was barely a thing when I got married. Needless to say, I made a profile and sat back after going through all the hopefuls and waited and waited. Before long I had a regular procession of strange requests from people offering me all kinds of things. Now, I don't consider myself a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but some of these people were making me blush with embarrassment. A friend recently asked me what it was like with Internet dating. The only way I could describe it is, you need to pull out a lot of weeds before you find a flower hidden in the garden. To which her reply was, "But I don't like gardening". Fair call, I thought. 

I was getting requests from people wanting to hook up for a regular hook up arrangement which is not me at all. I had people wanting me to join in with their partners, again not me, swipe left on that. Then I got the scammers. These disgusting people that have nothing better to do with their lives than pray on vulnerable people like myself and feed you an amazing story and luckily, I had enough red flags and alarm bells going off that I realised what was going on. One particular girl, lets call her Esther (That is her real name so be very aware) claimed that she lived in an apartment in St.Kilda and was working under contract as a petroleum engineer. At the time, I had no idea what a petroleum engineer even did (I actually still don't) so I thought that was pretty cool. She was working in Norway and would be home at the end of October. We continued chatting and more and more things were making me suspicious but at the same time I thought, that's plausible. The fact that Norway has one of the most advanced Internet coverage in the world and she couldn't make a video call was kind of plausible. I just thought she was on some platform in the middle of the ocean looking for cheap fuel to put in my car. The fact that she began saying she loved me and wanted to be with me for the rest of her life after a few days was plausible, because lets face it, I'm a catch........lol. The fact that she was telling me that she was getting five million dollars for the contract that she was working on and wanted to share it with me and invest in property and asked me to looking for multi-million dollar properties to invest in was plausible because i have no idea what a Petroleum engineer makes. 

The thing that did start making me wonder was one weekend she asked me if I like concerts. I told her that I did and the last one I had been to was Ed Sheeran with my friend Shelby. She immediately told me that she had met Ed when she was buying a property in the U.S. I was like, that's so cool, did you get any pics with him, she went silent for a moment and then told me that she had taken a Selie with him but it was on her old phone and that she had lost it along with Ed's number. OK, that part is plausible I guess, she wouldn't be the first to lose a mobile phone, probably won't be the last also. Then she said this, "When Ed was last over here, he came and stayed at my house with his crew". She just had to push the envelope just that little bit further. From that point on, everything just started to unravel for her. I asked if I could call her one day and she agreed to it but said that she was very shy on the phone. She told me at some point during our conversation about her American/Canadian background and I asked her if she had an accent and she told me that she had been living in Australia and had lost it over the years. Imagine my surprise when she did call she had a distinctive African accent. 

From there, the lies just kept coming. at one point she told me that she was heading to China to buy some items for her company, after the purchasing was done, she was going to have a week off and fly to Australia to see me. I was like, lets see how this pans out. Sure enough, she told me that she was in China and that she was very tired from the flight. By the second day she was telling me that she was very stressed out because the prices she was quoted for had changed and she didn't have enough money to cover the cost of what she needed (You can see where this is going already right?). I replied, why don't you just ask the company to transfer more money. After a while she told me that wasn't an option and that she would have to use her credit card and they would reimburse her when she returned. The next day she continued telling me how stressful it was and that she had a friend in the industry that agreed to give her $5000 to cover the costs. Mysteriously, that fell through and the inevitable happened. She asked me to send her $5000.......hahahahahaha. She seriously was asking the wrong girl. I replied I have nowhere near that sort of money, so she told me to send her what I had. I told her that I had enough for petrol (Notice the irony her being a petroleum engineer and all) for my car and nothing else after paying my rent and other bills and buying groceries. Then she came back with when do you get paid next. If you can send me the money for a plane flight, I can come and see you and be with you. 

It was at this point I finally said, "You can stop now, that's never going to happen but nice try. I'm done." She quickly replied, what do you mean, do you think I'm making this up. I just want to be with you. I just replied stop. 

So that was the demise of Esther and for a while there I was disheartened that all I could attracted were weirdos and scammers. I did have one successful date at least, until that fell apart three days later so back I went again to the dating sights. 

Eventually I found someone who fitted everything that I had been searching for. Someone kind, considerate and has a good heart. I'm not going to mention her by name just yet, because A. I don't want to embarrass her and B. I know that most of my friends will go looking for her and stalk her page to see what she's all about. She will read this and know who she is. At this point, that's all that matters to me because its still only early days yet and I don't wont to ruin what we already have established. Yes, I'm taking a very mature approach this time because I honestly believe that this could be something amazing and I don't wont to lose it now. We had our first date this past weekend and we connected in a way that I haven't with somebody for a very long time. This weekend coming, we are having our second date and I already know it's going to be amazing with what I have planned for us both.

This part of the blog is for you babe because I know you will be reading it as you are reading all my other blogs. Thank you so much for coming into my life and shinning your light on what has been at  times a very dark place. You have given me so much in these last couple of weeks and I look forward to what the future holds for us both moving forward. At the very least, I know I have a friend for life in you if not more. So, from the bottom of my crazy heart, thank you for bringing joy to my life once more. 

And along came Lara............(Part 16)

Sunday 20th January 2019

Well, its been 19 days since my last post and so much has happened in those last 19 days that I thought I'd better bring you all up to speed. 

I started this year by making a promise to myself that I was going to close the chapter on "Lisa" once and for all. I came to this conclusion or realisation because I honestly feared losing her as one of my best friends. She was a constant part of my life and still will be for many years to come I hope but she made it very  clear that it would never be anything more than that. 

I gave "Lisa" a card at Christmas time telling her that no matter what,  I was always going to be there for her to offer her love and support whenever she needed it without the commitment. For me to be able to move forward, I needed to try and make it clear (mostly to myself) that I needed to close that chapter in order to find someone who will be that special person in my life. As writing somehow makes it official, I chose that medium to convey this message. I once was told by a former employer that if you write  down and diarise your thoughts it actually helps you to achieve your goals. I'm not sure if this is what he had in mind when he told me but I thought I'd take a leaf out of his book and give it a shot. 

From there I set myself a goal to put myself out there as much as I can but then game the confusion again about who should be my target audience if you like. I know I'm not attracted to guys as previously stated, so that was never an option. So how do I begin this search for Miss right? 

I decided to go on an on line dating site and although I had some positive feedback, none of the matches seemed to suit the person that I knew in my heart that I wanted. As I said in my last blog, I already knew the kind of girl I wanted because I had already envisaged her through my positive thinking process. Thankfully, none of the girls on the dating site fitted the criteria that I was after so I lost hope pretty quick there. 

I then decided to search Facebook for dating pages. I found one for the LGBTQI community and decided to upload some photos and add a short bio about myself. Again, there was a little bit of interest but nothing earth shattering. One girl seemed to tick the boxes for a while and then it all seemed a little odd and some flags went up and I decided that she wasn't the one for me either. 

One morning I woke up and noticed that someone had replied simply saying "Hi". She had also sent me a friend request. I clicked into her page and looked at her pics and was straight away struck by this feeling that this girl was amazing. I couldn't quite describe it but she seemed very different from everyone else that had contacted me. I decided to do something that I wouldn't usually do, I accepted her request and sent her a message back saying "Hi". 

From this point we continued chatting for a while and getting to know each other better and over time we decided to go to the next step and have a video chat. That first video chat lasted about 5 hours. We talked so much about our hopes and dreams for the future, our likes and dislikes, what we wanted out of life and past relationships and what we were both searching for. During this time we discovered that we had so much in common from the music that we both liked to what we loved to drink. We had similar taste in movies, food and the same mutual respect for our fellow human beings regardless of race, colour, religion or sexual orientation.  

Before long I began to hear this voice inside me telling me that I think this is the girl that you have been waiting, hoping, wishing and praying for. Lara, was the girl that I had envisaged. It turns out that Lara was feeling similar feelings for me. Its kind of funny in a way, I remember thinking while I was listening to her, where have you been all of my life quickly followed by thinking that we have so much in common that its like i was starting to develop feelings for myself. That made me think of that episode of Seinfeld when Jerry discovers that the person that he has been looking for all his life is himself because the girl he was dating, was exactly the same as him. 

Lara and I decided that night that we were going to try and make a relationship work and make a commitment to each other. Ok, those of you with weak stomachs better not read this next paragraph because I'm going to get a little bit soppy. 

Since making this commitment to Lara my feelings for her have grown even more with each new day. Anyone who knows me or even works with me has witnessed a huge change in me, especially over the last week. Don't get me wrong, I have always tried to be a happy person but this past week, nothing and I mean nothing can take the smile off my face. Lara has been like a beacon of light in a sea of loneliness. She has picked me up me up and gave me the one thing in my life that I so desperately craved. I mean I have always had the love and support of those around me but it's not the same as having that person to share your inner most thoughts. Lara will sit there on the other end of the line and just stare at me with this intense look of interest in every word I say. 

One of my favourite things about Lara is her beautiful smile, without warning it will just envelop her beautiful face and brighten my screen and my heart just skips. When she laughs, she flicks her head back and this amazing joyous sound comes out of her mouth and all of a sudden its like she gets shy and covers her mouth with her hand and looks at me with her beautiful eyes and smiles with those. Her hair is amazing and I so want it. I maybe jealous of her hair but then she loves mine which astounds me. Every single thing about Lara is infectious.  She has so much going for her and at times I just stare back at her and say "Is this really happening or is it a dream that I'll eventually wake up from and I will be alone again". Lara reassures me that what is happening is real and that she's not going anywhere. 

Lara and I will face our challenges this is true. Any long distance relationship needs to e built on trust. Every relationship needs to be built on trust and if you don't have it in your partner, its destined to fail. In the case of long distance relationships because you're not seeing that person everyday, you have to believe that they are going to do the right thing. I have that level of trust in Lara to know that she won't break my very fragile heart. She has been hurt herself and let down by others as I have been and she understands the pain of what that feels like. On the same token, I wouldn't and couldn't do that to her either. As I said to Lara this morning (Oh, and if I seem to be saying the name Lara a lot it's because I just love saying her name. whether it's out aloud or just in my head I just love the way the letters dance together when you say it to form the word Lara) I was stuck in a loveless marriage for the last fifteen years of it and I didn't once cheat on her, so I'm sure not going to do that to someone I actually love and have feelings for. Yes, i went there, I love her and I'm not ashamed to admit it, Lara brings that much joy to my life as anyone who is around me enough can testify. 

Where is Lara exactly in the world I guess your wondering, well she lives in Nigeria. She works hard at her job as a beautician working some seriously crazy hours, not to mention the commute time. I will never complain about travelling 30mins to work when it takes Lara up to 2 1/2 hrs and at times up to 4 hours to get home each night by which time she is so tired that she can barely keep her beautiful eyes open long enough to hold a conversation but some how she pushes through it. 

On the most part, people have been very supportive of our relationship with some naturally concerned that maybe Lara's intentions may not be honourable. I had one friend who I want name ready to send her a message saying that she was really happy for us but if Lara hurt me she is someone who gets what she wants and would make her sorry. Thankfully the message wasn't sent and Lara only heard about the message from me. I decided to go around to my friends place to re-assure her that Lara was amazing and that we are both really in the same situation with the same vulnerabilities. For all I know she may have people telling her that I'm just trying to get her for her money. 

The sad thing is that some people do seek to exploit others vulnerabilities and by doing so make it harder for all those legitimate people looking for a soul mate. I have no such doubts that Lara's intentions are honourable as mine are with her. Not my style. During the course of my visit with my friend, Lara rang and after a few moments, I introduced her to my friend. By the end of the call she was telling me that she understood why I had fallen for her then jumped on line to check out flights from Nigeria to Melbourne. 

The simple fact is that Lara and I will have to face questions like this being asked of our relationship. It is not going to be easy but we are both committed to making this work. I have some amazing friends who have been and are currently in long distance relationships and they inspire me to know if you work at it, you can achieve it. The alternative, is to go back to being lonely again or worse still being with someone who's not the girl that I have developed such strong feelings for. I'm not about to lose Lara because it all gets to hard. I have always fought for things I believe in whether it be social injustice or just sticking up for a friend when they need support, that's just who I am and as a result, sometimes I do get taken advantage of. As sad as it is to admit, I'm becoming very good at reading the signs that someone is taking advantage of me and I maybe blinded by my feelings but I'm going to go on record here and say that Lara is not that person. 

In conversations with Lara, never has she ever brought up the subject of money....ever. If anyone has, its been me by admitting to her that I don't have any thanks to the debt I'm in from my marriage. In hindsight, by me saying that, that could of set off alarm bells in her head but she simply replied "It doesn't matter, don't worry". Another obstacle or challenge we will have to face is trying to keep our relationship on a low profile where Lara is concerned, sadly in Nigeria, same sex relationships are illegal and you carries a 14 year jail sentence. Someone like me, a transgender female potentially could be thrown in jail, rapped and beaten. That prospect scares the life out of me. To know that I could never travel to Lara's country to see where she grew up, went to school or even meet her friends and family actually makes me sad. The only way that we can see each other and be safe to be ourselves is if she came here to visit, so together, that is our goal. 

Lara and I have come together for a reason, whether it was God, the power of positive thinking or just fate, we are in each others lives for a reason and I look forward to making every minute of every day count with this beautiful girl. Lara, thank you so much for sending me that simple "HI" that one word has changed both of our lives forever. I look forward to a long and loving friendship, relationship and who knows whatever else the future has in store for us. The only thing that is certain is the love I have for you which is honest, respectful and all enveloping. 

During a conversation this morning, Lara blew me away yet again by sending me a song. Not only did she play it, but she sung it to me, it was the most beautiful thing that anyone has ever done for me. Yes, there was tears involved. Lara has so many amazing talents and singing is just another one to add to the ever increasing list of things that I love about her. 

Love you girl. 

Reflections of...........(Part 15)

Tuesday 1st January 2019

Let me kick this first post of the year off with Happy New Year to all of my amazing readers. I hope 2019 brings you all the joy, love and happiness that the year can provide. I would also like to thank you all for being apart of my journey and again thank you all for all the amazing feedback that you send me on my previous posts. You truly inspire me to keep this going. 

As any Educator will tell you, reflections are just another part of life. We do them Daily, Weekly, Monthly as well as some do them by the School term or by the year. Its a chance for us to reflect on what we have done, what worked and what didn't and how we to tweak it a bit to make it better. Its also a chance to set individual and group goals to try an achieve over a certain time frame. 

Over the past couple of years I have written down a few words of what I want to achieve for the New Year and do my best to stick by them as much as possible. Last year my goals were to let go of all the things that were holding  me back from being the best that I could be. I began by letting go of all of the negativity of the past and all the clutter out of my life. No more emotionally draining friendships where it was always all one way. You know the kind, where you always there for someone when they need to unload but when you need someone, their never there. 

I also began to believe in the power of positive thinking which led me to the law of attraction. Basically, if you surround yourself with positivity you will actually attract more positivity. I began to envisage a future where all i had to do was think about something I needed and eventually it would happen. 

A great example of this was when my good friend Narcisa and I went into a shop one day. It was a crystal shop, in the past I have avoided these sorts of places but due to my love of all things purple, I wanted to see what Amethyst stones they had. While looking through the shop, I came across a group of figurines cut out of various stones. One of the designs was of Ganesha, the Indian God that is said to bestow great wisdom and fortune upon its followers. I remember thinking that this would be a perfect gift for one of my Best Friend's Mandeep. 

Mandeep who I have spoken about previously, is my sister who introduced me to Indian culture and along with her fellow educators, kind of adopted me as one of their own. Ganesha was all over the shelf and I thought I wish there was a purple one because it made it all that more personal coming from me. Out of nowhere, a purple one appeared on the shelf that seriously wasn't there beforehand. I told my friend Narcisa what had just happened and I don't think she believed me straight away until I said, I wish there was another purple one so we could have a matching pair. All of a sudden Narcisa started laughing and eventually said, OMG, there's one right here. She picked it up and showed it to me. I replied, that so wasn't there before because I looked over every one of them. Narcisa agreed and from then on became a converted believer in the law of attraction. 

My developing friendship with Narcisa over the past year was probably one of the many big positives to come out of the year. Walking away from the negative influences in my life, gave me a chance to focus on more positive people. Narcisa is a girl I worked with at a previous centre and a mutual friend of my other friend Maida. The three of us teamed up throughout the year for catch ups and a comedy show in the city. We also did things separately. For Narcisa and I it was our road trips. We'd just decide that we were going for a drive, jump in the car with some snacks and just drive. 

It wouldn't matter if we were heading to somewhere close by like the Dandenong's or as far as Ballarat to visit Sovereign Hill, it was always a great day out just laughing at the silliest things and the funniest situations. It was great for us both just to spend some time away from the normality of our lives and take a chance to live in the moment. Some of our funniest moments were me telling Narcisa where we were headed and have her try to pronounce the name of our destination. The beautiful town of Warburton got absolutely butchered by Narcisa and remains a running joke to this day. This year I'll be looking for more places with Narcisa with even more complicated names. Places such as Eildon, Walhalla and Echuca are all places to be considered for this year. Thank you Narcisa for being such an amazing sport to endure my warped sense of humour but as you witnessed on Christmas Day, it came from somewhere. 

Also last year I became more acquainted with some of the families of the children I had in my care from the previous year. At the end of 2017 I met two amazing twins that went on to shape one of the most amazing friendships of 2018. Robyn is the twins Mum and and an unbelievable source of inspiration to me. It all came about when I went to the twins house for a visit after work one Friday night and to say it was very clear that they had missed me was an understatement. They dragged me from one end of the house to the other eager to show off their rooms. Then came the birthday parties which were amazing. I offered myself to Robyn as a babysitter anytime she wanted and thankfully her and her Husband Rob took me up on the offer. One night Robyn told me that she needed some "Sharon time" so I invited her around to my place for a catch up. We got to talking about our Careers over a bottle of wine and how I wanted to take mine to the next step. Robyn suggested I begin writing a blog. Who would want to read my story? was my reply. Robyn told me that I shouldn't underestimate how many people would actually be interested. The next day, I wrote my first blog. To date I have 376 combined members over my two pages. This coming year brings more of my journey and things that I want to focus on in the future. 

Although this year was all about positivity and gaining a new prospective, I once again became acquainted with the black hole of depression. For like a month in July, I lost perspective of everything and struggled to regain it for a while. I was sailing along so well that I decided to stop taking my anti-depressants thinking I don't need these anymore and I basically fell in a heap. Thankfully, my strong network of support managed to drag me back from the edge and I continued on. Wasn't one of my finest moments but it was a reminder that I still have a way to go. 

I also finally decided to stop feeling guilty and responsible for my wife Maria (much to the sounds of thunderous applause from my friends). I finally came to this conclusion after she found yet another way to hurt me not once but twice. This particular time was extremely vindictive so I decided to basically cut her from my life all together. I blocked her from social media and blocked her mobile number so she couldn't contact me again. I finally felt free from her grasp and knew that I wasn't going to allow her to hurt me again. 

Sadly this year there was a couple of deaths in the later part of the year which hit me quite hard. Firstly there was my Brother in law who passed away and because of me blocking Maria's number on my phone, I didn't get to hear about till two weeks after the fact by seeing it on Facebook. As soon as I realised what had happened, I contacted the family and thankfully was able to attend the funeral. I did expectantly run into Maria with her new partner which was more than a little awkward but we made it through without to much drama. The second person to pass this year was my Uncle. He was an amazing and kind human being who I admired a lot. Sadly over his last few years I hadn't seen him for a while and unfortunately due to work commitments, wasn't able to attend the funeral. I take comfort now that both of these relatives are in a much better place where pain can no longer hurt them. 

One of my biggest and hardest decisions came around June for me. I made the move to an amazing centre in November of 2017. I Co-Room led the Kinder room with the amazing and talented Mandeep who I have spoken to at great lengths in a previous post. I was their to fill in for the Kinder teacher who was on maternity leave. By the time she returned I was the Educational Leader for the centre and implementing some huge changes in the way we did programing and documentation. This was a role I really enjoyed and the experience was invaluable. I was asked to go to fill in at another centre one day and I accepted and went. From the moment I walked in the door, I was blown away. The wow factor of this centre was huge. 

Within two weeks, I had made the decision to move to this new centre after they offered me a position. It wasn't easy to leave one of my best friends and the people who excepted me as one of their own but necessary for my own growth. Within a week of being at my new centre I was offered the position as room leader for the 2-3  room and with my two amazingly talented assistants made our room the best it could be. This year I have been offered an exciting new role within the company that will see me reach goals that I have been working on for a while now. It will give me the opportunity to help shape our amazing centre for the future. 

This year I also had the extreme pleasure of being apart of four very special birthday parties. The first one was Phoebe, then came Hugh and Isla. After that it was time for two special girls who I have known since they were the age of 3-4 and I had them in my care at the centre I was working at. This year, we celebrated their 10th Birthday with all of their Kinder friends from the same year. In November I headed to Sydney to help celebrate another special birthday. Once again I had this child in my centre. She was in the nursery room and her and I built a bond that has seen me last year drive to Sydney to help celebrate her 8th birthday party. I have said it before but I'm am so blessed and humble at the fact that I have been allowed to be such a big part of my kids lives. 

My friends list over the past year has grown dramatically as I have met so many new amazing people. People I work with at my new centre, friends that I met over the year and the families of the children I tutor who have become friends also. 

This year I want to focus on meeting more new people and hopefully find the girl of my dreams. I have envisaged her already, she will be amazing, kind and caring. She will have a beautiful heart and a loving soul and we will complete each others lives in every way. I'm also going to keep culling the negativity out of my life so nothing can hurt me again. I'm going to continue to write blogs, posting posts and fighting for Transgender people everywhere. My life is a life of love and acceptance and I believe if I keep pushing that message of love, public opinion will have to make the change accept that LGBTQI people are just people. 

I have also decided that I'm going to find the courage at some point to walk back into Church. I have missed the fellowship with others and could use the guidance and direction of where God wants me to take this journey in the future.

Oh, and one more thing before I end this. This morning I made a promise to my longest best friend in the world. With a friendship lasting over 30 years and surviving two broken marriages I promised that before June this year I will come up to visit her. Rutha, I can't wait to see you soon.

So this is where I end this one, I would like to thank you all for your continued support of this page. Please feel free to share it to anyone who you think may benefit from its words. Also, if you have any questions that you want to ask me about my journey thus far, please feel free to inbox me from my Facebook page. Once again, I would like to wish everyone the brightest and glitter filled New Year possible. 

Sharon